Some people may see our codependent behaviors as normal and want to discount them and our amends. Accepting that this is their view, we can restate our amends to help keep our boundaries and recovery perspective in order. We remember we are cleaning up our part in each relationship, no matter how others Alcohol Use Disorder may see it. Making amends is a testament to the resilience and strength of the human spirit. It demonstrates the capacity for growth, redemption, and the ability to transcend the limitations of one’s past.
- Making amends is one of the most important parts of 12 step programs.
- Sometimes, a simple and sincere acknowledgment of your wrongdoings is enough.
- Those boundaries are really, really key and the most compassionate thing that you can do.
- However, with thoughtful planning and the support of your sponsor and fellow NA members, making amends can be a liberating experience.
- In Alcoholics Anonymous, this approach is reinforced through Steps Eight and Nine, which emphasize the importance of personal accountability and making amends without causing further harm.
Listen and Validate
- The four categories determine the manner in which the recovering alcoholic will express their amends.
- Some people may see our codependent behaviors as normal and want to discount them and our amends.
- For example, Dr. Bob, one of the original founders of the AA program, could not stay sober until he went around town and made amends to all those he had hurt.
- The first step is to know that your questions and feelings are normal.
A challenging step in recovery occurs in Celebrate Recovery lesson 16 as you offer amends for any harm you have caused to others. This takes serious courage, but it is a very freeing experience that you won’t want to miss out on. Making amends is one of the most important parts of 12 step programs. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines amends as “compensation for a loss or injury”. As relates to your addiction, this means compensating those that your addiction has hurt. In order to truly understand this concept, it is important to really understand the steps involved, and how it helps to complete them.
How Practicing Mindfulness Reduces the Risk of Substance Use
You never know exactly how the promises of aa will show up in your life while doing the amends, but they always show up for those who are painstaking about this phase of their development. As we shift our attention away from self-centeredness and towards the community, there is a noticeable decrease in self-seeking behavior. By focusing on communal support rather than individual gains, not only does this foster peer solidarity, but it also strengthens relationships and enriches the process of recovery. “If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
Be generous with your time.
This is part of our ongoing commitment to ensure FHE Health is trusted as a leader in mental health and addiction care. Take responsibility through admitting the hurt and pain that was caused by your addiction. At Living Amends, we strive to ensure that each recipient of our scholarship can get the on-going support they need to stay sober.
- Examples of making amends could be doing volunteer work, paying off an old debt, making a public apology, etc.
- Perhaps, the amends that you wanted to make might not seem right after discussing with a sponsor.
- The steps in recovery with Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) are 8 and 9.
- One focuses on direct contact, while the other narrows in on indirect actions.
- Essentially, it means making a radical shift in the way you live and sticking to that.
If you have committed a crime in the past or are in a situation where you cannot confront the people whom you have living amends offended, there are ways to make amends, indirectly. Sometimes, people who were involved in a drunken driving accident may take the step to become an organ donor. These are all selfless examples of how making indirect amends can help to heal a situation.
